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():love jokes (2491): A boy walks into the bathroom |
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| Posted by jeremy M. ABEL on 10-Aug-2005 | A boy walks into the bathroomA boy walks into the bathroom and catches his mom sitting on the bowl in her
full glory.
He runs out to tell his father. He asks his father "What's that big gash
between mommy's legs?"
The father replies, "That's where I accidentally hit her with an axe!"
The boy replies "WOW, you got her right in the cunt!"
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():love jokes (2491): A father charges into the bathroom |
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| Posted by cathy b on 10-Aug-2005 | A father charges into the bathrooma father charges into the bathroom and starts yelling at his son "son! how
many times have i told you not to do that? stop it! if you keep doing that,
you'll go blind!"
the son replies: "i'm over here, dad."
his son puts a guy into a nursing home. he doesn't know if he's going to like
it at first, but he decides to give it a shot for his son's sake.
the first morning in the nursing home he wakes up with a hard-on. out of
nowhere, a beautiful nurse walks in, kneels down, and blows him without saying a
word.
the guy gets on the phone to his son and says, "son! i love this place! thank
you so much for putting me in this nursing home!"
the son says, "wow, pop. you sound really happy. what happened?"
the old man says, " you won't believe it. i woke up this morning with a
hard-on, and the most beautiful nurse i've ever seen in my life came into my
room and blew me. didn't say a word. just blew me."
"well, that sounds great, dad. congratulations."
"well, thank you, son," the old man says, and hangs up the phone.
later that day, the old man is walking down the hall in his walker. he slips
and falls and can't get up. a big hillbilly orderly comes up to him, rips his
pants down, f**** him up the ass, and leaves him lying there in a heap.
the old man crawls to a phone and calls his son. "you got to get me out of
here, son. this place is nuts!"
"what happened, pop? you sound terrible!" says the son.
"well, i was walking with my walker and fell down and couldn't get up. then
this big hillbilly orderly came by, ripped my pants down, and f***** me up the
ass!"
"well, you know, dad," says the son. "you got a blow job this morning. you got
to take the good with the bad..."
"no, you don't understand, son!" exclaims the old man. "i only get a hard-on
once a month! i fall down three, four times a day!"
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():love jokes (2491): "he s*** the bed and turned blue, miss" |
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| Posted by Ulax B. Cool on 10-Aug-2005 | "he s*** the bed and turned blue, miss"Its the first day back after the holidays for the primary ones (first
graders), and the teacher decides to ask each of the children to tell a small
story about their fathers.
so the teacher points to little katy and asks, "katy, what does your daddy
work as?"
and katy replies "my daddy's an aircraft pilot, and he flies people all over
the world and makes them very happy."
the teacher then asks little david what his daddy does.
"my daddy is a postman, miss, and he delivers letters and parcels to people
sent from all over the place, and he makes people happy."
the teacher turns to little susan and is about to ask the same question as the
others, but susan suddenly bursts into tears. the teacher rushes over to console
her. "whets wrong susan?"
"my daddy is dead, miss" she replies.
"aww.... i didn't know that. i'm so sorry"
"it's ok" she choked out, through tears.
"so tell me susan, what did your father do before he died?"
"he s*** the bed and turned blue, miss"
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| Posted by Kelsey D. Dowswell on 10-Aug-2005 | The man enters a drugstore:- Give me a pack of condoms.
- What size?
- I do not know...
- Well, take this board with holes, and go to the toilet and measure.
In 10 minutes the man comes back:
- I have changed my mind, I don't need the condoms. How much is this board?
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| Posted by Josh G on 10-Aug-2005 | WHAT?! And to him too?Classical situation. The wife in bed with a fatigue lover, husband rushes
unexpectedly. The wife shouts to the lover:
- Dear! Prove to him that you're a real man!
Lover:
- WHAT?! And to him too?
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():love jokes (2491): Mum, what is it the daddy has? |
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| Posted by Marco The Great on 10-Aug-2005 | Mum, what is it the daddy has?A small girl suddenly sees her father coming out from the bathroom, and asks
the mum:
- Mum, what is it the daddy has?
- Well, my girl, it is such daddy's thing... If he hasn't it you couldn't be
here, (... pause...), and me, perhaps, too.
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