sex jokes
http://www.only-jokes.com - sex jokes
  Categories

Body & Health

gay jokes

gender jokes

love jokes

sex jokes

other gender & sex jokes

dirty jokes

battle of sexes



Navigation:

· sex jokes
· Add joke
· Last 5 jokes
· Best jokes
· Search jokes
  Adversting

  Service menu

· Freedback
· Recommend Us
· Subscription
  Our friends

There isn't content right now for this block.
():sex jokes (1888): A little compliment?


Posted by Alex A. Tarlescu on 13-Aug-2005

A little compliment?

A lady is working hard in her office when a co-worker tells her that her hair smells good. Immediately, she goes to her boss and tells him that she has been sexually harassed.

"How?" asks the boss.

"He said my hair smells good," replied the lady.

"Wouldn't you take that as a compliment?"

"Normally I would, but he's a midget."


   

0 people have rated this joke:
0.00/10
     

():sex jokes (1888): Bridge Hand


Posted by Francisco on 13-Aug-2005

Bridge Hand

The hostess of her bridge club got a last minute call from one of the players that she was sick. Unable to get a replacement on such short notice, she drafted her husband, a mediocre player with an attitude.

During the game, he got up and went to the bathroom, leaving the door ajar. Everyone listened as he urinated into the toilet. Embarrassed, his wife called out, "John, would you please close the door!"

John's partner said, "Never mind, it's the first time since we started playing that I've known what the man has in his hand."


   

0 people have rated this joke:
0.00/10
     

():sex jokes (1888): Coming out of the closet


Posted by Matthew D. Nuese on 13-Aug-2005

Coming out of the closet

In a small town some where in Illinois lies a family. It consisted of a husband, wife, three sons, and a daughter. One of the sons had a terrible secret.

"Dad, I don't know how to tell you this, but I'm gay," said the son.

The Dad was furious he couldn't believe that one of his sons was gay.

A year had passed and his second son approached him and told a very bad secret.

"Dad, I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'm gay."

The Dad went crazy again, he couldn't believe that two out of three sons were gays.

Another year had passed and the third son came forward. "Dad I know you're not going to want to hear this but, I'm gay.

The Dad was enraged he started shouting "DOESN'T ANYONE IN THIS FAMILY LIKE GIRLS ANYMORE?!!"

The daughter said, "I do, I do!"


   

0 people have rated this joke:
0.00/10
     

():sex jokes (1888): Alien Sex


Posted by Mark C. Francis on 13-Aug-2005

Alien Sex

One night a couple was sitting on the couch talking when they heard a terrible noise outside. They ran out to see what it was. When they got there they were shocked to see that and alien spaceship had landed in their backyard. The aliens said, "Don't worry we come in peace. We just want to talk."

So the couple and the aliens sit down to talk. After awhile they start to get tired to they decide to go to bed. The alien couple said, "Look we've never had sex with a human and we know you've never had sex with an alien so how about we switch places for the night." The human couple agreed. The human woman and the male alien began messing around in a bedroom.

When the alien man pulled out his dick the woman complained that it was too small, so he said, "Oh thats no problem look." He hit himself in the forehead and it grew 1 inch.

"Wow thats amazing"

"Yeah" he replied "just keep doing that until it is the size you want it."

Well after awhile she got it where she wanted it and then complained that it was too small around. so he said' "Well watch this" And pulled his ears. It got bigger around. "just keep doing that until its the size you want it." After that they started having sex.

The next morning after the aliens left the human couple were talking and the male asks, "So how was it?" She replied'

"It was the best thing that has ever happened to me. What about you?"

"Well I hated it!"

"Why?"

"The bitch kept hitting me and pulling my ears!"


   

0 people have rated this joke:
0.00/10
     

():sex jokes (1888): Coming home late


Posted by Jimbo Bimbo on 13-Aug-2005
Coming home late
Dave's friends came up to him after work one day and asked him to go out for a beer with them. Dave replied "No, I can't. My wife gets really pissed if I come home late." Dave's friend said "When you get home, just go slide beneath the sheets, pull her panties down and give her oral sex."

So Dave goes out with his friends and has a great time. When he comes home hours later, he goes into his room and slides beneath the sheets. He pulls down her panties and begins to give her oral sex. She starts to moan and groan. After awhile, Dave tells her that he has to go take a leak and for her to wait there. When Dave gets to the bathroom he's stunned to see his wife sitting on the john. "How did you get here?" he asked. "Shhhh," she replied. "My Mom is sleeping."

Submitted By: Julia


   

0 people have rated this joke:
0.00/10
     

():sex jokes (1888): Bumping into a stranger


Posted by Jim henswot on 13-Aug-2005
Bumping into a stranger
A man bumps into a Woman in a hotel lobby and as he does, his elbow goes
into her breast. They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and
says, Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive
me."

She replies, "If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 221."

Submitted By: Julia


   

0 people have rated this joke:
0.00/10
     

Jokes search
Input keyword:
Adversting


Body & Health | gay jokes | gender jokes | love jokes | sex jokes | other gender & sex jokes | dirty jokes | battle of sexes