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():gender jokes (1878): A little old lady walked into the main branch...


Posted by foxee sexee chik on 09-Aug-2005

A little old lady walked into the main branch...



A little old lady walked into the main branch of the Chase Manhattan Bank
holding a large paper bag in her hand. She told the young man at the window
that she wished to open an account with the bank and deposit the $3 million
she had in the bag. She said that prior to doing so she wished to meet the
president of the bank due to the large amount of money involved.
The teller opened the bag and saw bundles of $100 bills and thinking this a
reasonable request telephoned the president's secretary to make an appointment
for the lady.


Later the lady was escorted upstairs and ushered into the president's office.
Introductions were made, and she stated that she liked to get to know the
people she did business with on a more personal level. The bank president
then asked her how she came into such a large sum of money and whether it was
perhaps an inheritance.


She replied "No, I bet on people."


Seeing his confusion she explained that she just bet different things with
different people.
All of a sudden she said, "I'll bet you $25,000 that by 10:00 a.m. tomorrow
morning your balls will be square."


The bank president figured that she must be off her rocker but decided to take
her up on the bet. He didn't see how he could lose. For the rest of the day
he was very careful. He decided to stay home that evening and take no
chances, after all, there was $25,000 at stake. When he got up in the morning
and took his shower he checked to make sure everything was normal. There was
no difference. He looked the same as he always had.
He went to work and waited for the little old lady to come in at 10:00 a.m.,
humming as he went. He knew that this would be a good day. How often do you
get handed $25,000 for doing nothing he thought!
At 10:00 a.m. sharp the little old lady was shown into the president's office.
With her was a younger man who she introduced as her lawyer. She said she
always took him along whenever there was this much money involved. "Well, "
she asked, "what about our bet?"


"I don't know how to tell you this," he replied, "but I'm the same as I've
always been, only $25,000 richer!"


The little old lady seemed to accept this but insisted that she be able to see
for herself. The bank president thought the request reasonable and dropped
his trousers. She instructed him to bend over and then she grabbed hold of
him.
Sure enough, everything was fine, but then the Bank President looked up and
saw the lady's attorney across the room, banging his head against the wall.
"What's wrong with him?" he asked.


"Oh, him?", she replied. "I bet him $100,000 that by 10:00 a.m. this morning
I'd have the president of the Chase Manhattan Bank by the balls.







   

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():gender jokes (1878): Q. How is being at a singles bar different...


Posted by TMAN on 09-Aug-2005

Q. How is being at a singles bar different...


Q. How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?


A. At the circus, the clowns don't talk.








   

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():gender jokes (1878): Q. What makes men chase women they have no...


Posted by Anu Patel on 09-Aug-2005

Q. What makes men chase women they have no...


Q. What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?


A. The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of
driving.









   

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():gender jokes (1878): Q. What food describes most men?...


Posted by The Joker on 09-Aug-2005

Q. What food describes most men?...


Q. What food describes most men?


A. Jerky.










   

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():gender jokes (1878): Q. Men will brag that there are women waiting...


Posted by Burne L. Taylor on 09-Aug-2005
Q. Men will brag that there are women waiting...

Q. Men will brag that there are women waiting by the phone at this very
moment for their call. Who are these women?


A. Women working at 900 numbers.











   

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():gender jokes (1878): Q. How is a man like a used car?...


Posted by Jeanna M. Garloch on 09-Aug-2005
Q. How is a man like a used car?...

Q. How is a man like a used car?


A. Both are easy to get, cheap and unreliable.












   

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