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| Posted by Bexie on 09-Aug-2005 | CompareWhat would happen if men were to have periods?
They would compare the size of their tampons.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
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| Posted by Mikah B. Horn on 09-Aug-2005 | It's cuteWhat did the elephant say to the naked man?
"It's cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"
The man replied, "No, but it can pick up dates."
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
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| Posted by Mira Maines on 09-Aug-2005 | Kitty litterIf you throw a cat out of a car window is that considered "kitty litter"?
Submitted by Curtis
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| Posted by wwwwaaaaasssaaa on 09-Aug-2005 | Dead beaverWhat do a fur trapper and a necrophiliac have in common?
They are both looking for dead beaver!
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
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| Posted by Charlie Morris on 09-Aug-2005 | DazTiger Woods was teeing up on the first hole of the Open championship, he hit his first shot and it sliced to the right.
His next shot was no better, again he sliced it right.
Feeling disgruntled, he jokingly asked if anyone could prevent him from making the ball go right.
And to his suprise a little old lady pushed her way to the front of the crowd and said she had some magic powder that would stop his shots going right.
Tiger was a bit dubious about this, but thought he would have nothing to lose.
He teed up the ball and the little old lady sprinkled this magic powder onto the ball.
Tiger took his shot and it went 320 yards straight down the middle of the fairway.
Tiger was impressed. He lined up his next shot and again the little old lady sprinkled the magic powder on to his ball.
Again it flew straight as an arrow and finished two feet from the flag.
Tiger was amazed at this and asked the little old lady what the magic powder was.
"It's Daz," said the little old lady.
"Daz!?" exclaimed Tiger.
"Yes, Daz," said the little old lady, "Apparently it stops colors from fading!"
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
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| Posted by J R on 09-Aug-2005 | Stuck to the floorA woman is drying herself after a shower when she suddenly slips over and lands spread-legged on the bathroom floor.
She tries to stand up again but realizes that she landed so hard that her vagina has stuck to the floor creating such a vacuum that she can't move.
She calls out to her husband for help. He tries with all his strength to lift her up but she won't budge.
So he goes next door and gets the neighbor. Both of them are pulling like oxen but she just won't move. She is truly stuck to the floor.
Suddenly the neighbor says, "Why don't we just get a hammer and break the tiles around her legs and lift her that way?"
"Great idea," says the husband, "But let me rub her boobs a little to arouse her."
"Why?" asks a confused neighbor.
"She'll need the lubrication so I can slide her over into the kitchen. The tiles are cheaper in there."
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
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