|
|
 |
|
 |
 |
| Posted by Parsa Fattahi on 11-Aug-2005 | Courses for Women1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before
2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits
3. Combating the Imelda Marcos Syndrome: You Do Not Need New Shoes Everyday
4. Parties: Going Without New Outfits
5. Man Management: Discover How Minor Household Chores Can Wait Until After the Game
6. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too
7. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor Is His
8. Valuation: Just Because It's Not Important to You . . .
9. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, Not the First
10. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking
11. Communication Skills III: Getting What You Want, Without Nagging
12. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire
13. Party Etiquette: Drinking Your Fair Share
14. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up
15. Introduction to Parking
16. Advanced Parking: Reversing Into A Space
17. Overcoming Anal Retentive Behavior: Leaving the Towels on the Floor
18. Water retention: Fact or Fat
19. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter
20. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not For Human Consumption
21. Cooking III: How Not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People
22. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully
23. PMS: Your Problem . . . Not His
24. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To
25. Sex - It's For Married Couples Too
26. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have
27. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice
28. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together
29. Ballet: For Women Only
30. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both
31. Learning to Go in Public Rest rooms
32. Appreciating the Humor of the Three Stooges
33. "Do These Jeans Make My Butt Look Big?" - Why Men Lie
34. TV Remotes: For Men Only
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Steelers R. Awesome on 11-Aug-2005 | Definition of Modern WomanShe drives a Red Sport Car.
She has a hyphenated last name.
She thinks Cooking and Fucking are two cities in China.
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Sexy Monster on 11-Aug-2005 | Do Women Talk to Much?Sam was trying to show his wife that women talk much more than men. To prove his point he showed her a scholarly study that showed men, on average, use about l500 words per day as opposed to women, who use at least 3,000.
Gussie, his wife, pondered this for a little while and then thought of an answer. "Women", she said, "must use twice as many words as men, because they have to repeat every thing they say."
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Jay Knite on 11-Aug-2005 | Drive Em WildQ. What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild?
A. Money
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Marc C. Fryer on 11-Aug-2005 | English Translations By GenderWomen's English:
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
I'm sorry = You'll be sorry
We need = I want
It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious
by now Do what you want = You will pay for this later
We need to talk = I want to complain
Sure, go ahead = I don't want you to
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
You're so manly = You sweat a lot and you need to shave
Your certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you think about?
Be romantic, turn off the lights = I don't want you to see my flabby thighs
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
I want new curtains = And carpeting and furniture and wallpaper . . . .
Hang the picture there = NO! I mean hang it there!
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? = I am about to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today that you aren't going to like
I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful
Nothing = Everything
Everything = My PMS is acting up
Nothing really = Your such an ass hole
Men's English:
I'm hungry = I'm hungry
I'm tired = I'm tired
Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I take you out for dinner? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I call you sometime? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
May I have this dance? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Nice dress = Nice cleavage
You look tense, let me give you a masssage = I want to fondle you
What's wrong? = I guess sex tonight is out of the question
I'm bored = Do you want to have sex tonight?
I love you = There I said it, Let's have sex now
I love you too = Now we have to have sex!
Let's talk = I am trying to prove to you that I am a deep person and maybe then you'll have sex with me
Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys.
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by KrAzYBoY on 11-Aug-2005 | Everything Men Know About WomenThe following is a comprehensive federal study, approved by the Attorney General:
Everything Men Know About Women
End of Report
U.S. Attorney General's Office
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
