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| Posted by Doc Robinson on 09-Aug-2005 | Dark in HereA woman takes a lover during the day while her husband is at work.
Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, so she shoves the kid in the closet and shuts the door. The husband also comes home, so she puts her lover in the closet, with the little boy.
The little boy says, "Dark in here."
The man says, "Yes, it is."
The boy says, "I have a baseball."
Man, "That's nice."
Boy, "Want to buy it?"
Man, "No, thanks."
Boy, "My dad's outside."
Man, "OK, how much?"
Boy, "$250."
The next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together.
Boy, "Dark in here."
Man, "Yes, it is."
Boy, "I have a baseball glove."
The lover remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?"
Boy, "$750."
Man, "Fine."
A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove, let's go outside and have a game of catch."
The boy says, "I can't, I sold my baseball and my glove."
The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?"
Boy, "$1,000"
The father says, "That's terrible to overcharge your friends like that...that is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."
They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here."
The priest says, "Don't start THAT again."
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| Posted by leanna on 09-Aug-2005 | THE FAMILYOK GET THIS. OK THERES A MOTHER,A FATHER,A SON,AND A DAUGHTER THAY WERE HAVING SOME GUESTS FOR DINNER THAT NITE THE FATHER TELLS THE SON TO GO GET A HOT DOG AND NOT TO GET CANDY SO THE LITTLE BOY IS AT THE CANDY STORE GOES UP TO THE CLERK AND SAYS"DO YOU HAVE A KNIFE?"
THE CLERK SAYS"YES" AND HANDS HIM THE KNIFE THE SON SAID TO THE CLERK "DO YOU HAVE A BATHROOM?"
THE CLERK KNODS YES AND POINTS TO IT.THE BOY WENT IN THE BATHROOM WITH THE KNIFE AND CUTS OF HIS DICK GETS CANDY WITH THE MONEY GETS BACK TO THE HOUSE AND THE MOTHER ASKS THE DAUGHTER TO GO GET A PUSSY (CAT) AND TOLD HER NOT TO BUY ANY GLITER THE MOTHER GIVES HER MONEY THE DAUGHTER GOES TO THE GLITER SHOP AND ASKS THE CLERK"DO YOU HAVE A KNIFE?"
THE CLERK SAYS "YES" AND HANDS IT TO HER THEN SHE ASKS "DO HAVE A BATHROOM?"
HE KNODES YES AND POINTS. SHE GOES IN AND CUTS OFF HER PUSSY GETS GLITER WITH THE MONEY BACK HOME THE DAD ASKS THE SON IF HE CAN GO GET MEAT BALLS AND TELLS HIM NOT TO BUY CANDY AND GIVES HIM MONEY HE GOES TO THE CANDY STORE AND WELL YOU ALREADY KNOWS WHAT HAPENS BACK HOME MOMS NOW MAKING DINNER ITS CHRISTMAS AND MOM GAVE SIS HER PRESENT (THE PUSSY) DAD GIVES BRO HIS PRESENT AND ITS CANDY LATER THAT NITE THAY STARTED EATING THERE FOOD I HOPE THAY GOT WHAT THAY WANTED. THE END
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| Posted by J L on 09-Aug-2005 | 3 QuestionsEve really wanted 2 become really popular so she went to church 2 go speak 2 god. when she got there she told god tht she wanted to be popular. God sed answer the nxt 3 questions and all ur wishes will come true.
God- Question 1: Wot is ur name? Eve- Thts easy y its eve! God- Correct
God- Question 2:Who do u really adore? Eve- Adam! god- Correct#
God- Now 4 the final question u have to think very hard 4 it! God- Question 3: Wot was the first thing u sed to Adam? Eve- ummmmm........ Thts a hard 1 God- Correct
UR NXT 30 WISHES COME TRUE NOW THINK WISELY B4 U USE THEM ALL!!!
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| Posted by Zach Evans on 09-Aug-2005 | Healing the SickGrandma and Grandpa were watching a healing service on the television. The evangelist called to all who wanted to be healed to go to their television set, place one hand on the TV and the other hand on the body part where they wanted to be healed. Grandma got up and slowly hobbled to the television set, placed her right hand on the set and her left hand on her arthritic shoulder that was causing her to have great pain. Then Grandpa got up, went to the TV, placed his right hand on the set and his left hand on his crotch.
Grandma scowled at him and said, "I guess you just don't get it. The purpose of doing this is to heal the sick, not raise the dead."
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| Posted by Kim T on 09-Aug-2005 | Rejection LinesTop 10 rejection lines given by men (and what they really mean)
10. I think of you as a sister. (You're ugly.)
9. There's a slight difference in our ages. (You're ugly.)
8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. (You're ugly.)
7. My life is too complicated right now. (You're ugly.)
6. I've got a girlfriend. (You're ugly.)
5. I don't date women where I work. (You're ugly.)
4. It's not you, it's me. (You're ugly.)
3. I'm concentrating on my career. (You're ugly.)
2. I'm celibate. (You're ugly.)
and the number 1 rejection line given by men (and what it actually means)
1. Let's be friends. (You're the ugliest person that has ever existed on this planet.)
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| Posted by Rachel Kensington on 09-Aug-2005 | Barrel of Fun!There's this guy who went to this camp for adults, so the owner is showing him around, and says, "You're gonna love it here, especially the barrel behind the restrooms, when you feel the need, stick you're dick in the hole for a blowjob.
"So the next day,the guy sees the owner, and says, "this place is great, I'm going to use that barrel everyday."
The owner says, "Everyday except Mondays."
"Why not on Mondays?"
The owner says, "That's your day in the barrel."
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