|
|
 |
|
 |
 |
| Posted by lakerfan on 12-Aug-2005 | Dead baby jokesWhat do you get when you stab a baby in the neck?
Erect
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
| Posted by SmarteeS11 on 12-Aug-2005 | Getting highhow do you get high in the sea?
sea weed!
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Brandi J. Austin on 12-Aug-2005 | Teeth!!!!!Your teeth are so yellow you spit out butter.
Your mamma\'s so stupid she put a quarter in a parking meter and said, \"Hey wheres my gumball?\"
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Scooby on 12-Aug-2005 | BubblesWant to hear a clean joke, Bob took a bath with Bubbles.
Want to hear a dirty joke, Bubbles was the guy next door.
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by Cara Peterleus on 12-Aug-2005 | Little Johnny\'s BreakfastLittle Johnny wakes up and comes down to breakfast. Since he lived on a farm, his mother asked if he had done his chores.
\"Not yet,\" replied little Johnny.
His mother tells him he can\'t have any breakfast until he does his chores.
Well, now he\'s a little pissed, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken.
He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow.
He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig.
He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
\"How come I don\'t get any eggs and bacon? Why don\'t I have any milk in my cereal?\" he asks.
\"Well,\" his mother says, \"I saw you kick a chicken, so you don\'t get any eggs. I saw you kick the pig, so you don\'t get any bacon, either.
I also saw you kick the cow, so you aren\'t getting any milk this morning.\"
Just about then, his father comes down for breakfast, and he kicks the cat as he\'s walking into the kitchen.
Little Johnny looks up at his mother with a smile, and says...
\"Are you going to tell him, or should I?
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Posted by michelle someone on 12-Aug-2005 | Letter To SantaDecember 26, 1999
Dear Santa,
You must be surprised that I\'m writing to you today, the 26th of December. Well I would very much like to clear up certain things that have occurred since the beginning of the month, when, filled with illusion, I wrote you my letter.
I asked for a bicycle, an electric train set, a pair of roller blades, and a football uniform. I destroyed my brain studying the whole year. Not only was I the first in my class, but I had the best grades in the whole school.
I\'m not going to lie to you, there was no one in my entire neighborhood that behaved better than me, with my parents, my brothers, my friends, and with my neighbors. I would go on errands, and even help the elderly cross the street. There was virtually nothing within reach that I would not do for humanity.
What balls do you have leaving me a fucking yo-yo, a stupid whistle, and a pair of socks? What the fuck were you thinking you fat son of a bitch?!
That you have taken me for a sucker the whole fucking year to come out with some shit like this under the tree. As if you hadn\'t fucked me enough, you gave that little faggot across the street so many toys that he can\'t even walk into his house.
Don\'t let me see you trying to fit your big ass down my chimney next year. I\'ll fuck you up. I\'ll throw rocks at those stupid reindeer and scare them away so you\'ll have to walk back to the fucking North Pole, just like what I have to do now since you didn\'t get me that fucking bike.
FUCK YOU SANTA. Next year you\'ll find out how bad I can be, you FAT-SON-OF-A-BITCH!
Sincerely,
Little Johnny
|
0 people have rated this joke: |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
