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| Posted by iRiShBaBi Smith on 09-Aug-2005 | Defective Blow-up DoA guy goes running into a sex shop to return his blow-up doll.
He says to the owner, "Excuse me, but I blew this doll up last night and straight away she went down on me. I want my $50 back."
The owner says, "Hell, if I'd have known she was going to do that, I'd have charged you $75!"
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| Posted by Darmah G. Ontario on 09-Aug-2005 | Professional PunishmThree guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia. One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the sheik came in.
"I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding to your profession."
The sheik turned to the first man and asked him what he did for a living.
"I'm a cop," said the first man.
"Then we will shoot your penis off!" said the sheik. He then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living.
"I'm a firemen," said the second man.
"Then we will burn your penis off!" said the sheik. Finally, he asked the last man, "And you, what do you do for a living?"
The third man answered, with a sly grin, "I'm a lollipop salesman!"
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| Posted by Tuck on 09-Aug-2005 | Two East Coast HookeThe two East Coast hookers decided to move to the West Coast and while driving through New Mexico they stopped at a little general store.
Well, lo and behold there were two older Indian women sitting on the front porch and the four women started up a conversation, which eventually got round to one of the hookers asking what tribe the older two women were from.
The oldest Indian woman said "Well I'm a Navajo and she is an Arapaho."
One of the hookers said "No Shit? Well I'm a New York Ho and she is a Chicago Ho."
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| Posted by David J. Nicholson on 09-Aug-2005 | Who You Making LoveQ: How do you tell if you're making love to a nurse, a schoolteacher, or an airline stewardess?
A: A nurse says: "This won't hurt a bit."
A schoolteacher says: "We're going to have to do this over and over again until we get it right."
An airline stewardess says: "Just hold this over your mouth and nose, and breath normally."
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| Posted by Joe J. Shmo on 09-Aug-2005 | Who's This Guy?After a long night of making love, the young guy rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter. Unable to find it, he asked the girl if she had one at hand.
"There might be some matches in the top drawer," she replied.
He opened the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man. Naturally, the guy began to worry.
"Is this your husband?"
he inquired nervously.
"No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him.
"Your boyfriend then?"
he asked.
"No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his ear.
"Well, who is he then?"
demanded the bewildered guy.
Calmly, the girl replied, "That's me before the operation."
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| Posted by Vince Carter!!! on 09-Aug-2005 | Happily MarriedThere was this couple that got married recently, and they both were happy about the whole thing.
He was happy about the hole....
She was happy about the thing.....
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