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| Posted by Ben Travis on 09-Aug-2005 | Digging holesA fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. As he stood by his car to drink his cola, he watched a couple of men working along the roadside.
One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on.
The other man came along behind and filled in the hole.
While one was digging a new hole, the other was about 25 feet behind filling in the old. The men worked right past the fellow with the soft drink and went on down the road.
"I can't stand this," said the man, tossing the can in a trash container and heading down the road toward the men.
"Hold it, hold it," he said to the men. "Can you tell me what's going on here with this digging?"
"Well, we work for the county," one of the men said.
"But one of you is digging a hole and the other fills it up. You're not accomplishing anything. Aren't you wasting the county's money?"
"You don't understand, mister," one of the men said, leaning on his shovel and wiping his brow.
"Normally there's three of us ... me, Rodney and Mike. I dig the hole, Rodney sticks in the tree and Mike here puts the dirt back.
Now just because Rodney's sick, that don't mean that Mike and me can't work."
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Tantilazing
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| Posted by leilah on 09-Aug-2005 | YesWhat did the frustrated brunette say to her uninterested lover?
"What part of 'yes' don't you understand?"
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman
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| Posted by Kamikaze Hamster on 09-Aug-2005 | Reindeer factDid you know...
While both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year, according to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid December.
Female reindeer retain their antlers until after they give birth in the spring. Therefore, according to every historical rendition depicting Santa's reindeer, every single one of them, from Rudolph to Blitzen had to be a female.
We should've known. Only women would be able to drag a fat-ass man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night and not get lost.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Tantilazing
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| Posted by Tammy Roy on 09-Aug-2005 | Chatting womenTwo women were chatting and one asked the other,
"Mable, do you talk to your husband while you're having passionate intercourse?"
Mable answered, "Heavens no! Why would you want to make a phone call at a time like that?"
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
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| Posted by Cara E. Busch on 09-Aug-2005 | StartledHow do you describe a brunette whose phone rings on Saturday night?
Startled.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman
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| Posted by shayan nouri on 09-Aug-2005 | Pregnancy Q & AQ: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.
Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after it finishes college.
Q: What is the most common pregnancy craving?
A: For men to be the ones who get pregnant.
Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.
Q: The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why? A: 'Cause you're fatter than they are.
Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?
Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.
Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.
Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.
Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.
Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.
Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
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