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| Posted by Yolanda Holsten on 09-Aug-2005 | Divorce TimeVisiting a lawyer for advice, the wife said, "I want you to help me get a divorce.
The Lawyer says OK, what are your grounds.
My husband is getting a little queer to sleep with."
"What do you mean?" asked the attorney. "Does he force you to indulge in unusual sex practices?"
"No," replied the woman, "and neither does the little queer."
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| Posted by jacob m on 09-Aug-2005 | Wedding NightThe nervous young bride became irritated by her husband's lusty advances on their wedding night and reprimanded him severely. "I demand proper manners in bed," she declared, "just as I do at the dinner table."
Amused by his wife's formality, the groom smoothed his rumpled hair and climbed quietly between the sheets. "Is that better?" he asked, with a hint of a smile."
"Yes," replied the girl, "much better."
"Very good, darling," the husband whispered. "Now would you be so kind as to please pass the pussy."
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| Posted by brandon on 09-Aug-2005 | Tragic LossA man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?"
The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?"
The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, "My wife's first husband."
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| Posted by Emmorality on 09-Aug-2005 | Favorite FlowerWhile attending a marriage seminar on communication, Jim and his wife listened to the instructor declare: "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."
He addressed the men: "For instance, gentlemen, can you name your wife's favorite flower?"
Jim leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "Pillsbury All-Purpose, isn't it?"
The rest of the story is not pleasant.
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| Posted by good-looking on 09-Aug-2005 | Wrong ManAt the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren`t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
The other replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
Reviewed by Tantilazing
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| Posted by Moosen on 09-Aug-2005 | FoolAfter a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you."
She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
Reviewed by Tantilazing
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