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| Posted by Cameron Dude on 09-Aug-2005 | ExerciseHow do men exercise at the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Submitted by Glaci
Edited by Tantilazing
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| Posted by john mcgilvray on 09-Aug-2005 | If men had PMSIf men had PMS, what would happen?
a) The federal government would allocate funds to study it.
b) Cramps would become an acceptable reason to apply for permanent disability.
c) There would be a federal holiday every 28 days.
d) All of the above.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman
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| Posted by Lori Shake on 09-Aug-2005 | Ten pounds!What's the difference between a whale and a dyke?
Oh, about ten pounds, and a plaid shirt.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
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| Posted by Sway Braun on 09-Aug-2005 | Gingerbread manWhy are gingerbread men the best men of all?
They are cute, they are sweet, and if they give you any lip, you can bite their heads off.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
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| Posted by Bluestar on 09-Aug-2005 | TransplantA man comes to the doctor and says, "m-m-m-my d-d-dick is so pressurized that I st-st-stutter."
The doctor tells him he will give him a dick transplant. He loses his 3-foot-long dick for a 4-inch-long dick.
He comes back in a week and says, "Now my wife wont have sex with me. May I have the old one back?"
The doctor replies... "A d-d-d-deal's a d-d-d-deal."
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
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| Posted by Ben J. Elias on 09-Aug-2005 | Penis TaxThe only thing that the IRS has not yet taxed is the male penis. This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemlpoyed, 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 10% of the time it is in the hole. On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts.
Effective January 1st, 2004 your penis will be taxed according to size. The brackets are as follows:
10"- 12" Luxury Tax..........$30.00
8"- 10" Pole Tax.............$25.00
5"- 8" Privilege Tax.........$15.00
4"- 5" Nuisance Tax..........$3.00
Males exceeding 12" must file under capital gains. Anyone under 4" is eligible for a refund. PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION!!!
Sincerely, Pecker Checker IRS
*****NOTE*****
We are still waiting for answers for the following questions:
- Are there penalties for early withdrawals? - What if one's penis is self employed? - Do multiple partners count as a corporation? - Are condoms a deductible expense as work clothes? - Is there an additional tax if you are not circumcised?
Submitted by Calamjo
Eedited by Curtis
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