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| Posted by Whiteknight on 09-Aug-2005 | Fantastic LoverWhile making love to his wife, Rajeeb discovered he couldn't concentrate. Though they were only married a few years, he reflected unhappily, their lovemaking had become infrequent and essentially joyless.
Then, suddenly alarmed, he cried, "What happened? Did I hurt you?"
"No," said his surprised wife.
"Why do you ask?"
"No reason, really," he replied with a sigh.
"It was just for one moment there I thought you moved."
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| Posted by Tim Alive on 09-Aug-2005 | I Love You Terribly.Last night I was in a rare tender mood. I made love to my wife and afterward held her close.
"I love you terribly," I whispered.
"You certainly do," was her reply.
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| Posted by Hyper Tin on 09-Aug-2005 | A Scrote?In a check out line the other day and the couple were arguing about whose turn it was to pay. The clerk was kind of listening until she heard the lady said to the guy, "Stop being a scrote."
With a furrowed brow the clerk asked, "What is a scrote?"
Without missing a beat the lady responded,
"Short for scrotum. He is somewhere between a prick and an asshole."
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| Posted by Abby Proffer on 09-Aug-2005 | The Broom FamilyA young Southern peasant girl of fourteen went to work in a broom factory. After 2 months she gave the boss a two-week notice. The boss was quite unhappy to let her go since she was hard working, knew her tasks etc. He called her into his office, "But why?"
he asked.
"Nothin, I just wanna quit that's all," she said sullenly.
"Look, I'll give you a raise."
"No," she said.
"You can't just quit like that. There must be a reason. Tell me."
"Okay if you must know..."
said the girl, and she took off her underwear and pointed to her pubic hair, "Look, I haven't had this before, it's the broom's bristles, I tell you..."
Tickled by her innocence, he too took off his underwear and showed his, and said, "Ha ha...my dear, it's nature. Look, I have it, too...."
"Oh no!" the girl cried, "I can't wait two weeks, I quit now! Not only do you have the bristles, but you've grown the handle as well."
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| Posted by Brittany E. Stange on 09-Aug-2005 | 50 Years OnA husband and wife are celebrating their 50th anniversary. That night the wife approaches her husband wearing the exact same sexy little negligee she wore on their wedding night. She looks at her husband and says, "Honey, Do you remember this?"
He looks up at her and says, "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night we were married."
She says, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that night."
He nods and says, "Yes dear, I still remember."
"Well, what was it?"
she asks.
He responds, "Well honey, as I remember, I said, "Ohhhhhhhhh Baby, I'm going to suck the life out of those big tits and screw your brains out."
She giggles and says, "Yes honey, that's it. That's exactly what you said. So, now it's 50 years later, I'm in the same negligee I wore that night. What do you have to say tonight?"
Again he looks up at her and looks her up and down and replies, " Mission Accomplished."
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| Posted by daniel baier on 09-Aug-2005 | Dancing PartnersLittle Johnny is bored all day, hanging around the house. He goes into his parents room and finds them having sex.
"What are you doing?"
Johnny asks.
"Uh, well, we're dancing."
replies his mother.
"What's daddy doing?"
"He's my partner, now run along."
A few nights later, Johnny goes into his sisters room and catches her having sex with her boyfriend.
"What are you doing?"
"Ummm, dancing."
"What's your boyfriend doing?"
"He's my partner, now get out of here!"
Then Thanksgiving came around and Johnny's relatives were at his house. Johnny went into the bathroom and saw his grandfather beating his meat.
"What are you doing?"
Johnny once again asks.
"Why I'm dancing."
said his grandfather.
"Well, where is your partner?"
His grandfather replied, "When you've danced as long as I have, you don't need a partner."
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