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| Posted by Naya on 09-Aug-2005 | Fire up the grillA husband and his wife who have been married 20 years were doing some yard work.
The man was working hard cleaning the BBQ grill while his wife was bending over, weeding flowers from the flower bed.
So the man says to his wife "Your rear end is almost as wide as this grill" She ignores the remark.
A little later, the husband takes his measuring tape and measures the grill, then he goes over to his wife while she is bending over, measures her rear end and gasps, "Geez, it really is as wide as the grill!"
She ignores this remark as well.
Later that night while in bed, her husband starts to feel frisky.
The wife calmly responds, "If you think I'm gonna fire up the grill for one little wiener, you are sadly mistaken."
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| Posted by Crazy Chick on 09-Aug-2005 | Romantic weekendA couple decided to Alaska for a romantic weekend. When they got to the cabin it was cold so the wife asked her husband to go chop some wood for that fire place.
He came in after 5 minutes and told his wife that his hands were cold, so she said her put your hands between my thighs to warm them.
So he did and went back outside to finish chopping wood. He came in after another 5 minutes and said " honey my hands are cold again".
So she tells him here put your hands between my thighs to warm them. So he did and then he went back out to chop some more wood.
5 minutes has passed and he went in again and said, "honey my hands are cold again".
She then said, " Damn don't your ears ever get cold?"
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| Posted by laken thompson on 09-Aug-2005 | Is that what I do?Husband: "Honey, why do you usually answer me back with a question when I ask you?"
Wife: "Is that what I do?"
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| Posted by chicken E. taste on 09-Aug-2005 | Angelina Jolie"You wouldn't sleep with Angelina Jolie for a million dollars, would you?", asked the cuddling wife.
"Don't be ridiculous", said the husband. "How am I gonna raise a million dollars?"
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| Posted by Kent O. Smith on 09-Aug-2005 | Cold wivesTo men dicussing how tight ass cold their wives had been to them about giving sex.
The first fellow says "My wife's so cold I can put a glass of water in bed with her and the next morning its turned to ice."
The second fellow says "Hell, every time my old lady spreads her legs the furnace kicks in!"
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| Posted by Blitz Krieg on 09-Aug-2005 | Divorce questionsQ. Are you married?
A. No, I'm divorced.
Q. And what did your husband do before you divorced him?
A. A lot of things I didn't know about.
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