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| Posted by jc spencer on 09-Aug-2005 | Flat onesWhat do rocks and women have in common?
You skip the flat ones!
Submitted by blueindiansquaw
Edited by Curtis
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| Posted by Philip Hadfield on 09-Aug-2005 | Perfect breakfastYou're sitting at the table and your son is on the cover of Wheaties.
Your mistress is on the cover of Playboy.
And your wife is on the back of the milk carton.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Glaci
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| Posted by Tenny on 09-Aug-2005 | Anal glaucomaA man called his boss one morning and said, "I can't make it to work today. I am sick."
The boss asked, "What's wrong?"
The employee replied, "I have anal glaucoma."
The boss said, "What the hell is that?"
The man replied, "Well, I just can't see my ass coming in to work."
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by BreeBrown
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| Posted by KissyFace on 09-Aug-2005 | IgnoranceThe little brother of an Army radar operator asked, "Jim, tell me how does a radar work?"
"The radar transmitter emits brief impulses of electromagnetic waves which are reflected from the target and received by a special receiver.
Since the speed at which electromagnetic waves propagate is exactly known and the time they take to travel to the target and back can be determined with a great degree of accuracy it is possible to determine the range to the target as well as the direction to it."
His brother pondered a moment, then said, "As long as you don't know, Jim, why don't you just say so?"
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Glaci
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| Posted by Michael D. Marchand on 09-Aug-2005 | BackwardsWhat happens if a woman puts her panties on backwards?
She gets her ass chewed.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
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| Posted by josh l. dowland on 09-Aug-2005 | Clean dish!Two confirmed bachelors sat talking, their conversation drifted from politics to cooking.
"I got a cookbook once," said one, "but I could never do anything with it."
"Too much fancy work in it, eh?" asked the other.
"You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way, 'Take a clean dish.'"
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
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