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| Posted by Ricky THE MAN on 09-Aug-2005 | Floating votersHave you heard the elections in South East Asia have all been cancelled.
Some problem with floating voters they said.
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| Posted by Rashadanah Williams on 09-Aug-2005 | Thai foodWhy are so many sharks stricken with diarrhea?
They've been eating Thai food since Christmas.
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| Posted by Autumn on 09-Aug-2005 | Surfing competitionThere was controversy over the winner of a Surfing competition in Australias gold coast.
The Indonisian on a cupboard door had not filled out an application form or even caught his wave in Australian waters.
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| Posted by Tony C. Weston on 09-Aug-2005 | Mayor of SpokaneJim West, the mayor of Spokane, Washington, said I never masturbated in my office. ... Even a former president of the United States can't make that claim.
-Jay Leno
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| Posted by Dancin Girl on 09-Aug-2005 | Bloody noseThere was a man who had a problem getting an erection so he goes to the doctor.
The doctor takes all kinds of tests and finally decides that he can cure the man.
The doctor tells the man to go home and wait until his wife is asleep, and then to reach down between her legs and get a little love juice on his finger and rub it under his nose, and that this would stimulate his brain and then he would get an erection.
The man takes the doctors advice and that night after his wife has gone to sleep he reaches down between her legs and gets some of her juice and he rubs it on his upper lip right under his nose.
After a minute or two he starts to feel a tingling between his legs, so he grabs some more juice and rubs it under his nose. The next thing he knows he has a full erection.
He is real excited he wakes up his wife to share in the good news.
He wakes her up and says look what I have. She rolls over and looked at him and says "You wake me up at two in the morning to show me that you have a Bloody Nose."
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| Posted by Its All Good on 09-Aug-2005 | Night tied to a treeA farmer had advertised his farm and was showing it to a prospective buyer.
As they walked along a fence line the buyer saw bee hives and stopped.
He said, "Those hives are pretty close to the road." The farmer explained that the bees just made honey and have never stung anyone.
The buyer felt unsure about the sale until he proposed that he be tied to a nearby tree, naked, overnight.
If he was stung once he would get the farm for free, but if he wasn't stung then he would pay the farmer double the price.
The farmer agreed and tied the now naked man to the tree.
The next morning the farmer saw the man leaning over and very pale. "Oh no," the farmer thought, "he got stung and now I have to give him the farm!"
As he reached the man he gently shook him and asked where he got stung and if he needed a doctor.
"No, no, I'm okay I guess," gasped the naked man. "I have no choice, do I? I'll pay you double for the farm... but doesn't that calf have a mother?"
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