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| Posted by Sun -. Shine on 13-Aug-2005 | Sperm Bank Stick UpA masked man walks into a sperm bank, points a gun at the woman behind the counter and shouts, 'Open the safe!'
'But this is not a real bank!' the woman replies, 'It's a sperm bank.'
'Open the safe or I'll shoot!' the man shouts.
The woman, now terrified opens the safe.
'Now take one of the bottles and drink it,' he says.
'But sir, these are sperm samples!' the woman replies.
'Just drink it or I'll shoot!'
The woman opens the bottle and drinks the lot. 'Now take another bottle and drink it.'
'But sir, I just drank one!'
'Drink another one or I'll shoot you!'
The woman has no alternative and drinks a second bottle.
When she has emptied it, the man now takes off his mask and the woman is surprised to see the robber is her husband.
'Now you see, Honey,' he says, 'It isn't so difficult, is it?'
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3 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by Matt Lackey on 11-Aug-2005 | Old Men With Blow-Up DollsThere was these two old men sitting in one of the old mens house. They haven't had sex in 20 years... The first old man then said,"I have an idea...Lets go to the whore house and have sex with a young lady!" The other old man agreed and they went to the whore house and went to the lady up front and asked her for one woman each to have sex with.. The lady behind the counter thought,"well my girls are to good for these old mean,so I'll give them blow up dolls...They wont know the difference." So she gave them each a blow up doll and the old men thought they were real living girls.. They went to a room did their business and came out and went home.. On the way home the 1st old man said,"You know..when i was doing my business i think that girl was dead,she didnt say anything,move or anything..Just laid there" he looekd at the other old man and said,"what do you think?" The other old man looked at him and said,"I think mine was a witch.." the first old man asked,"Why you say that?" and the 2nd old man responded,"Because when I bit her on the boob she farted and flew out the window."
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():battle of sexes (734): What should you give a man who has everything?... |
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| Posted by jon a. johnson on 07-Aug-2005 | What should you give a man who has everything?...What should you give a man who has everything?
- A woman to show him how to work it.
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| Posted by Kenny S. Goff on 11-Aug-2005 | The Paki On The MoonQ. What do you call a paki on the moon?
A. A problem.
Q. What do you call ten paki's on the moon?
A. A bit bigger problem.
Q. What do you call a hundred paki's on the moon?
A. A pretty big problem.
Q. What do you call a thousand paki's on the moon?
A. A very large problem.
Q. What do you call all the paki's on the moon?
A. A problem solved.
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9 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by Chrissy Demetrion on 10-Aug-2005 | Little too lateA lovely woman decided to visit a penthouse restaurant. So she rode the
elevator to the top floor of the building. She had a drink at the bar and then
decided to get some fresh air, so she walked out on the balcony. She got too
close to the railing and fell over the side.
As she was falling about thirteen floors, a man was standing on the balcony
below. He reached out his arms and engulfed her, pulling her to his chest. He
asked, "Do you f***?" She answered, of course not. I'm not a slut!" The man
opened his arms and said, "Sorry???.
As she had fallen another thirteen floors, another man was standing on a
balcony, and he reached out, grabbed her in his arms, pulled her to his chest
and asked, "Do you suck?" She answered, "Of course not. what kind of a girl do
you think I am?" The man opened his arms, and said, "Sorry???.
As she had fallen another thirteen floors, another man was standing on a
balcony. He reached out, engulfed her with his arms, and pulled her to his
chest. Before he had a chance to say anything, she says, "Look, I f***, I suck,
and I'll do anything else you want!" He opens his arms and says, "You slut!"
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