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| Posted by Cal-Girl on 14-Aug-2005 | The Rules1. The female always makes the rules.
2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notifications.
3. No male can possilby know all the rules. Nearly all females are born
with this knowledge.
4. If the female suspects the male knows the rules she may immediately
change some or all the rules.
5. The female is never wrong.
6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a misunderstanding, which is
the direct result of a male having said or done something wrong.
7. If rule #6 applies, the male must immediately apologize for the
misunderstanding.
8. The female can change her mind at any given point in time.
9. The male can never change his mind without the express written consent
of a female.
11. The female has every right to be upset or angry at any time.
11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to
be angry or upset.
12. The female must under no circumstances let the male know whether or
not she want him to be angry or upset.
13. Any attempt to change the rules could result in severe bodily harm.
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| Posted by Tom Dunlap on 14-Aug-2005 | MenHow do men define Roe vs. Wade?
Two ways to cross a river.
What is gross stupidity?
144 men in a room.
Husband: I don't know why you wear a bra, you've got nothing to
put in it.
Wife: You wear briefs, don't you?
What's the difference between a porcupine and a Porsche?
The porcupine has pricks on the outside.
What's a man's view of safe sex?
A padded head board.
Only a man would buy a $200.00 car and put a $2000.00 stereo in
it.
Why do men love computers?
No matter what mood they are in, they can still get a floppy in.
What's the differnce between a clitoris and a pub?
8 out of 10 men can find a pub.
What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted.
What's the difference between a man and a catfish?
One is a bottom feeding scum sucker...the other is a fish.
Why do men hope to marry a virgin?
They can't stand the criticism.
What do you get if you have two balls in your hand?
A mans undivided attention.
What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
1. no mind
2. no business
What do you call an intelligent man in America?
A tourist.
Why do men name their penises?
They want to be on a first name basis with one who makes all
their decisions.
If men got pregnant.... abortion would be available in
convenience stores and drive through windows.
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| Posted by Emily Eddy on 14-Aug-2005 | Kitchen
Why did the woman cross the road?
I dunno, What the fuck is that bitch doin outa the kitchen?!
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| Posted by Icman78 on 14-Aug-2005 | Girls and BoysQ: Why does a lady have a "y"?
A:Because if she didn't, she'd be a "lad".
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| Posted by Bob Jones on 14-Aug-2005 | Pick Up Line: Mirror in PantsIs that a mirror in your pants? Because I can sure see myself
in them.
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| Posted by hmmmmm A. have a guess on 09-Aug-2005 | ImmortalityI recently picked a new primary care physician.
After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age.
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"
He asked, "Well, do you smoke tobacco or drink beer or wine?"
"Oh no," I replied. "I've never done either."
Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?"
I said, "No, I've heard that all red meat is very unhealthy!"
"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, ballooning, or rock climbing?"
"No, I don't," I said.
He said, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or sexually fool around?"
"No," I said. "I've never done any of those things."
He looked at me and said, "Then why do you give a shit if you live to be 80?"
Submitted by blueindiansquaw
Edited by Curtis
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