Why do elephants have 4 feet?...

-Because 4 inches isn't enough.

How is a man like a snow fall?...

-You never know how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

A man walked into the bar and there was a...

The man asked the bartender what the gorilla was doing in the bar so the bartender showed him. He took out a bat and hit the gorilla over the head with it. The animal instantly dropped down and gave the bartender blow job.

The Bartender then asked the man if he would like to try it.

The man said "Sure, but please don't hit me quite so hard".

What's the difference between "ooh" and "aah?...

-About three inches.

Did you hear about the guy who got his vasectomy...

-Every time he gets a hard-on, the garage door goes up.

Two men were walking along the street when...

One man said, "I sure wish I could do that."

The other replied, "You can, but you're probably going to have to pet him first."