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| Posted by Kenna M. Buice on 14-Aug-2005 | Yummy CornOnce apon a time there were 3 guys riding down a dirt road in
Kentucy. After an hour of driving their truck broke down and it
was getting really dark. There was only enough blankets in the
back for one guy so the two other decided to go look for help.
Along down the dirtroad they spotted a house. They stopped and
knocked on the door and a 98 year old lady answers the door and
says, " Can I help you boys?"
The boys looked at each other and then said, "Yeah our truck
broke down like 2 miles down the road and we need somewhere to
stay."
Th old lady replied,"Well you can stay here only if you have sex
with me constantly all night."
The boys looked at each other and said, "Alright."
So they walk in the house and they see a bowl of corn on the
table. The old lady goes upstairs to get herself ready and the
boys grab the corn. They go upstairs and start to screw her with
the corn and throw it out the window until the whole bowl is
gone. When they are done they go to sleep and the next morning
they go out to meet there friend, when they see him he has a big
smile on his face. Th boys look at each other then ask him,"Why
are you so happy?" HE answers. "Well I had me a good dinner last
night." The boys asked "how?" The other one replies,"I dunno but
some dumbass was throwin buttered corn out the window!"
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| Posted by Cutie23Girl on 14-Aug-2005 | The Sheerist Underwear Christmas was around the corner and a man wanted to give his
wife the perfect Christmas present for her. So he decided to go
to the Victoria's Secret Store. When he got inside he asked the
lady at the desk "Can you bring out some sheer underwear, it
will be a present for my wife for Christmas." So the lady
disappears into the back and comes out with some underwear. She
says to him "This underwear is $150 dollars." "But I want
something sheerer, infact bring me the sheerest you've got." the
man replies. The lady again goes into the back and comes back
with another pair of underwear. She says, "Sir, this is the
sheerest underwear we sell, it costs $300." The man says,"Well I
guess I'll have to buy it then." He buys the underwear and
leaves.
Christmas rolls around, and he gives her the present. She
opens it up and says,"It's perfect." He tells her to go try it
on and he says,"I'll be waiting on the bed for you." She
disappears into the bathroom and try's it on. She looks at it in
the mirror and says in her head, I cant even see the underwear
so might as well not even wear it.
So she walks out and see's her husband on the bed bare ass.
He looks at her and says,"Geez you could of at least ironed it."
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| Posted by Mike Richards on 14-Aug-2005 | ShagerarderThere was once a girl called Shagerarder. Her mother needed to
go shopping so she left shagerarder on her own for a while.
While Shagerarder's mother was gone the postman came and knocked
on the door. Shagerarder answered at once and the postman said,
"hello there, i've come to drop off this package." Shagerarder
took the package and said, "thankyou, please, come in."
"No, i can't," replied the postman, "i've gotta go."
"i'll tell my mummy." she said. The postman thought for a moment
and then said, "oh ok then. If you insist." He went inside and
had a cup of tea. When he'd finished he said, "im sorry, but ive
really gotta go now"
"No." said Shagerarder, "don't you want to come and look around
upstairs?"
"I can't. I've gotta go, sorry."
"I'll tell my mummy." said Shagerarder.
"Ok then," said the postman
When they'd finished looking around upstairs Shagerarder said,
"do you want to go in my bedroom?"
"I can't." replied the postman, "sorry but i've really, really
gotta go now."
"I'll tell my mummy..."
"Oh ok then,"
While Shagerarder and the postman were upstairs Shagerarder's
mother returned home from the shops and began to yell,
"Shagerarder?!! Shagerarder?!!" but the only reply she received
was from the postman, screaming, "i'm tryin', i'm tryin'!"
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| Posted by Michael Jackson jokes on 14-Aug-2005 | cupcakesA girl and her mom go to the zoo. When they arrive at the monkey
section they notice two chimps fucking. The girl goes up to her
mom and askes her mom what are they doing. The mother thinks for
a while and tells her that the are making cupcakes. The mother
quickly takes the girls hand and walks away from the cage. The
next day the girl and her mom are sitting on a bench at the
park. They look across the road and notice there are two
teenagers having sex in the bushes. The girl surprised askes her
mother what the are doing. She quickly answers they are making
cupcakes. The mother picks up her daughter and runs home. The
next day the girl goes up to her mom and tells her that she knew
her and her father were making cupcakes the previous night. The
mother surprised asks her how she knows this. The girl looks at
her mother and answers, "I licked the frosting of the bed."
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| Posted by Morgan E. Stromberg on 14-Aug-2005 | $1.45This guy was getting married and was worried about his
honeymoon, so he went to the sex specialist and told him her his
story and she said "ok, heres what you do, practice bouncing
this quarter on your stomach and when youve got it came see me
in a week". So he went home and started
practicing,"quarter,quarter,quarter,quarter".He went back in a
week as instructed and said "Doctor,Doctor!!!!,ive got it!
Quarter,quarter,quarter,quarter". "DR" "Very good, now i want
to practice doing that and bouncing these 2 dimes on each side
of your hip's and when youve done that come back in a week".So
he went home and started to practice, "Quarter dime dime,
quarter dime dime, quarter dime dime,quarter dime dime". He went
back in a week as instructed and said " Docter Doctor!!!!! ive
got it!!! "QUarter dime dime,Quarter dime dime,quarter dime
dime, quarter dime dime". "DR" "Great, now i want you to
practice doing that while bouncing this dollar on your back and
when youve done that come back in a week.( in one week he gets
married).So he goes home and starts practicing "Quarter dime
dime dollar, quarter dime dime dollar, quarter dime dime
dollar,quarter dime dime dollar". He went back in one week as
instructed and said "Doctor Doctor!!!!!! ive got it! Quarter
dime dime dollar, quarter dime dime dollar,quarter dime dime
dollar,quarter dime dime dollar" "DR" "Excelent! now have a
great time on your honeymoon". So he got married and its 10:00
pm and he is fucking her like he practiced saying in his head
""Quarter dime dime Dollar, quarter dime dime dollar,quarter
dime dime dollar.quarter dime dime dollar" His wife
screams"Faster&Harder!" so he does and in his head agian hes
saying "Quarter dime dime Dollar, quarter dime dime
dollar,quarter dime dime dollar.quarter dime dime dollar" Agian
feeling great his wife say's "Faster&harder!" "MAN" "$1.45!
$1.45! $1.45!
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| Posted by Laura Brown on 14-Aug-2005 | 3 nunsthree nuns were sitting on a bench. A guy suddenly came up and
flashed them.
the first nun had a stroke
the second nun had a stroke
the third ones arm wasn't long enough
:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):
):)
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